Posts tagged “platform pumps

The Snookification

It’s Christmas time, so it only makes sense that I should write about last Halloween. Here’s a step-by-step guide of how to turn yourself into that herpes-infested pumpkin lady we all love to loathe so much.

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Most Disturbing “Sexy” Halloween Costume Concepts

Look, while I don’t participate in the trend, I know many girls use Halloween as an excuse to look like a cheap hooker. I’m okay with costumes like “Officer Naughty” and “Voluptuous Vampiress”. What bothers me are slutty costumes based on innocent childhood characters. C’mon, people. Let’s make Halloween more about cheap chainsaw chills and less about child molestation.

Girl Scout Troop Leader: ‘Scuse me, but when did “girl” suddenly mean “fully-developed woman with giant cans”? Girl scouts don’t wear platform pumps and a garter. Guys, I understand the appeal of a tight-fitting little ditty gracing your gal, but let’s move away from having her dressed as a tiny child selling cookies.

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