Yahoo! Answers is a breeding ground for teenagers, the desperate, trolls, and troll dolls, so naturally, I hang out there sometimes. I’ve compiled a list of the weirdest questions I’ve come across in that weird, weird place in cyberspace.
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February 6, 2011 | Categories: Awkward, Bored, Comedy, Creepy, Drugs, Humor, Internet, Uncategorized, WTF | Tags: Alabama, answers, ants, attraction to cats, aunt, Axe body spray, back, balls of steel, bendy straw, black ants, blow up doll, boyfriend, boys, brother, butt itches, butter, can you eat ants, cannibalism, cats, chocolate, cigarettes, clubbing, cocaine, coffee, condoms, cousin sex, crazy, crazy girls, crazy people, creepy, crush, dare, dental floss, distilled water, do you like waffles, do you think I'm pretty, drugs, drunk, energy drink, exams, exercise, fire ants, first cousin, first trimester, gatorade, girlfriend, girls, gym, high, high school, high school sex, hot tub, hours, incest, inch, Internet, male enhancement, mayonnaise, meat, mom, mom sex, nervous game, Oedipus complex, old, penis, penis enhancement, penis enlargement, permission, pervert, police, poop, poop stuck, poop stuck in butt, pregnancy, Prince Charles, rectal itching, red bull, relationships, Rock star, rockstar, rooster, second cousin, sex in school, shoulders, singles and dating, sister, studying, substance abuse, suicide threat, teenagers, teens, trash, trolls, waffles, WHO WAS PHONE, why are girls so into me, why can't I grow wings, wings, working out, Yahoo Answers | Leave A Comment »
Here’s an incredibly racist and incredibly poorly drawn comic I made, inspired by my boyfriend’s imaginary superhero, Racism Man.
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September 24, 2010 | Categories: Bored, Uncategorized | Tags: black, boyfriend, cape, entitlement, fight, government, KFC, Kool Aid, Nazi, Obama, racism, Racism Man, racist, superhero, watermelon, white, wrong | Leave A Comment »
…Unless you count DayQuil.
1. I sang to my boyfriend’s cat, Shadow. I sang him a ballad entitled “Shadow” to the tune of Frère Jacques. The lyrics consisted of “Shadow, Shadow, Shadoooooooow”.
2. I performed a questionably seductive* dance with a small bottle of apple juice in the middle of Kroger.
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August 28, 2010 | Categories: Bored, Comedy, Disease, Drugs, Heath, Humor, Illness, Medicine, Sickness, TV, Uncategorized, Wellness | Tags: ABC Family, ailment, apple juice, Avril Lavigne, bed, Ben and Jerry's, blanket, boobs, bored, boyfriend, bra, Campbell's, cat, cats, Chicken, children, common cold, concert, dance, Dating in the Dark, drugs, erotic dance, farts, felines, fever, flatulence, Frere Jaques, funny, get rich quick, health, homicide, ice cream, Joey Lawrence, kids, Kroger, life, medicine, Melissa and Joey, Melissa Joan Hart, Melissa Joan Heart, money, seductive, seventh grade, shadow, sick, sickness, sleep, soup, suicide, TV, wacky, wellness | Leave A Comment »
Who woulda thought that the “forever” in Forever 21 was actually an acronym? Below, you can find the top secret meaning of the store’s title that the clerks don’t want you to know. For your convenience, I’ve attached links to the website in case you want to buy a present for that special shithead in your life.
F stands for Fugly, as evidenced by this sweatshirt showcasing the retired Walmart smilie wearing a geezerish bowtie. His eyes have changed into hearts over time due to him relentlessly staring at little boys.
O stands for Overseas. While I appreciate the fact that Forever 21 is desperately trying to be Takeshita Dori– and in Japan, Minnie Mouse is totally badass– in America, Minnie Mouse gear should be reserved for girls age 10 and under. If you are in your teen years or older and wear this, I will personally see to it that I punch you in the face. (more…)
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August 17, 2010 | Categories: Clothing, Comedy, Humor, Pop Culture, Uncategorized | Tags: accessories, boyfriend, champagne, clothes, Forever 21, grammar, man bag, man purses, murse, nonsense, overalls, shirt, shorts, smilie, t-shirt, top, underage drinking, Walmart, WTF | 3 Comments »
