“No! Don’t go in there! There’s poop!”
“What?” I asked.
“That’s The Poop Spot!” Dante screamed over the whir of his chainsaw.
“What?!” I yelled.
Dante shut off the saw and took off his goggles. He was covered in wood chips. “Kevin,” he said, “don’t go in that cave. That’s The Poop Spot.”
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July 5, 2011 | Categories: Awkward, Bored, Comedy, Fiction, Humor, Legends, Uncategorized, WTF | Tags: axe, beard, birthday cake, cave, chainsaw, Christmas, cinnamon buns, crap, Dante, deuce, dump, fiction, flannel, flash fiction, forest, Kevin, legend, lumberjack, lumberjacks, magic, myth, nature, nymph, oak, pine, poop, pop a squat, port-a-potty, porta potty, Santa, saw, sex, shirts, shit, shit my cake says, shooting stars, spell, sudden fiction, suspenders, tale, tall tale, the poop spot, Trees, turd, turds, wife, wish, wishes, wishing well, woods, woodsmen | 1 Comment »
Today, as you fire up the grill and pop open that thirteenth beer, you may feel like reflecting on American history and saying a little prayer of thanks to the founding fathers. Don’t. The Fourth of July isn’t the holiday you think it is. I’m here to tell you the top secret history behind the Fourth that the government doesn’t want you to know.
As you may know, Benjamin Franklin was a man with syphilis who lived in America and sometimes ate dog treats. His face is on the $100 bill and he was well known for attempting to steal kites from children. But here’s something you didn’t know about Benjamin Franklin: he’s out to steal the Declaration of Independence.
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July 4, 2011 | Categories: Awkward, Bored, Comedy, Fiction, Holidays, Humor, Movies, Uncategorized, WTF | Tags: 1776, 2012, 4th of July, America, beer, Benjamin Franklin, butt, December 21, Declaration of Independence, fireworks, fireworks in butt, founding fathers, Fourth of July, government, grill, heist, history, holiday, Independence Day, John Connor, July 4, lesson, Mayan calendar, National Security, National Treasure, Nicholas Cage, racist, robbery, Sarah Connor, shit my cake says, steal, stealing, Terminator, time travel, United States of America, USA, WTF, YouTube | Leave A Comment »
Thrift stores aren’t known for having the trendiest, cleanest, or most hair-free clothes, but occasionally you can find some cool stuff in them. You can also find really ugly stuff, as evidenced by the following photos:
This negligee appears to be from Bill Cosby’s new lingerie collection, Space Pudding. It debuted at Fashion Week in the “No More Faking Headaches” tent.
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July 1, 2011 | Categories: Awkward, Bored, Clothing, Humor, Shopping, Uncategorized, WTF | Tags: Big Bird, Bill Cosby, Blackbeard, brown bananas, cats, chlamydia, clothes, clothing, colors, crap, dance, dead bird, Donald Trump, Donald Trump's hair, dress, dresses, feathers, hair, ironic t-shirts, lingerie, Margaritaville, Mrs. Claus, PG 13, ripe bananas, shirt, shit my cake says, shopping, store, thrift, thrift store, thrifty, ugly, ugly clothes, vest, vomit | 2 Comments »
